I had a decision to make. I was choosing the people I wanted to represent my circle. My girl squad. AKA My bridesmaids. I wrote a list of names down and it was actually pretty easy. They were people I had known for most of my life. My sister and 3 of my best friends from my school days. ‘Done’, I thought. But something was bugging me. The last name on the list was someone I hadn’t seen or spoken to for a long time. Someone I had tried to reconnect with, but was ignored. Someone who just didn’t seem interested in maintaining our 10+ year friendship. She was on her own path, and I was travelling in a completely different direction.
I crossed her name off the list. I realised our friendship was over. Despite all the things we had been through together, all the amazing memories we shared – we were no more. She had her own ideas of friendship now, whereas I had grown to see it differently.
To me, I have always wanted a few close friends instead of hundreds of acquaintances who drop in and out of your life – but that doesn’t mean I object to welcoming new people into my world.
Making friends in your twenties sucks. I don’t just mean meeting and connecting with people, but actually making good, solid and REAL friendships. People you can tell anything to and they would love you regardless. People who don’t get jealous of your successes, but celebrate them! Friends who care if you’re unwell or having a hard time so they send you care packages. Friends you can go crazy with! Get into trouble. Take chances and make new memories. I’m lucky to have a handful of people in my life that I can say that about, but those kind of friendships are hard to find as an adult. As a child you find that person because you run up to them on the playground and invite them to play, if you did that as an adult, you’ll probably end up in handcuffs…
So how do people do it?
I’ve been asking myself this. I don’t necessarily need new friends, I like the ones I have, but sometimes you just want to expand your circle a little bit. After all, there are over 7 billion people in the world….
Say hello to Bumble.
If you’re a fan of xAmeliax like I am, you might have seen that she’s become the Queen Bee of the Birmingham Hive for Bumble. Bumble is an app that helps you meet people (for dates, friendship or networking). If you’ve ever used Tinder, you’ll get the idea of how it works, but without the naughty reputation. On Saturday, I attended one of Amelia’s Bumble events at Rofuto in Birmingham as a way of connecting with other bloggers and potentially meeting some likeminded people. I thoroughly enjoyed the whole experience! The food was delicious and the company was even better! I think the whole idea behind Bumble and these events is great for awkward people like me who have no clue how to meet new people these days…
I’ve even had some lovely conversations through the Bumble app and I’m finding it so refreshing to be making these new connections.
It’s like a social playground – just pop up and say hey.